Richy Rich regularly took a selection of the kids camping. One time he had three of ’em, aged 6, 4 and 1.5. On the Sunday, he took them to the beach at Highcliffe, near Bournemouth. They walked down the cliff path to the beach, dumped their stuff and ran into the sea. Instantly a big wave knocked Richy’s glasses off and swept them away.
Now Richy is like Vincent van Gopher without his glasses. He can’t see squit-diddly. This is not a good situation to be in with teeny tiny kids in the sea.
My eyesight has got much worse over the past couple of years. I’ve gone from wearing glasses to watch tv, to wearing glasses to stop banging into things. I take em off every night and leave them on top of the toilet. One Sunday morning I got up early, did my biz and flushed the toilet. My dressing gown sleeve caught my glasses just at that point and whizzled them down the toilet.
“AAARRRGGHHHHHH!!!!!”, I screamed in horror… “Whassup?” said a sleepy Richy Rich… “I flushed my glasses down the toilet..” I gibbered. Continue reading