Category Archives: life

Chicken bone man and extreme porn

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Public places, shops, cafes and transport are endless sources of fascination, full of half heard conversations, snippets of drama, humour, puzzles and mysteries.  The underlying question for me is always; how do we all manage to rub together so effectively? Old Garfinkel helps out with that question, especially with his rule breaching exercises where he got students to go and deliberately break social rules in order to make visible the intricate layers of shared understandings people have about what is acceptable or otherwise. Continue reading →

*,,;&’*”-).

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Im hoping the statute of limitations has passed on this one and everyone involved has retired When I was working as a research assistant at the other Hometowny university I was given a very important job by the head of the school Could I oversee the printing of the end report for a very large five year programme of work It was going to take the form of a big glossy brochure to be mailed out to everyone and their dog Continue reading →

The glasses and the toilet bend

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My eyesight has got much worse over the past couple of years. I’ve gone from wearing glasses to watch tv, to wearing glasses to stop banging into things.  I take em off every night and leave them on top of the toilet.  One Sunday morning I got up early, did my biz and flushed the toilet. My dressing gown sleeve caught my glasses just at that point and whizzled them down the toilet.

“AAARRRGGHHHHHH!!!!!”, I screamed in horror… “Whassup?” said a sleepy Richy Rich… “I flushed my glasses down the toilet..” I gibbered.     Continue reading →

The tannoy

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I was shopping in Ikea with little sis, Sammy Seal, when an announcement came over the tannoy; ‘Would Sarasiobhan please make her way to Customer Services. Sarasiobhan to Customer Services’.

‘OMG! This is it! I’ve won a prize!’ I said to the Seal. ‘Whoo hoooo!!! Probably the millionth customer, or maybe the billionth globally!’ She didn’t seem overly excited as we went to find Customer Services. Would it be a cash prize or a supermarket sweep type jobby, I wondered. How funny. Five minutes ago I was an ordinary shopper, now I could have a lifetime’s supply of Billy bookcases.

‘I’m Sarasiobhan’, I said to the woman at Customer Services. ‘Oh’, she replied, ‘You left your purse in the toilet’.

The day I got locked out

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   Laughing boy (3/5 kids, pictured on the right, next to 5/5) was off school sick when he was about 9. Being not quite of this world (some people would say he is autistic with learning difficulties) I was a bit stuck when I needed some milk. He was comfy watching endless episodes of Barney, so I decided to risk a quick trip to the Co-op (50 metres away).

I read the riot act – don’t move, don’t stop watching the tv, do not get off the settee, do not leave the living room, DO NOT go near the front door. Do you hear me? NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS!! He seemed totally on board. I went out of the house, shut the door, then realised no door key.  Hilarious. Continue reading →